Here we are looking toward Autumn from the late summer glory of August. July was a challenging month for many, including me, what with Jason’s knee injury, getting settled into our new home, and adjusting to the massive energy uplevel that came with the move. I’m looking forward to August being a time of continued integration of new, higher frequencies, gardening, and breathing life into my infant business (more on that later).
I look forward every month to Kari Samuels’ forecast, in which she blends astrology, numerology, tarot, and spiritual guidance. I am sharing her forecast for August here, and it looks to be a time of intense clearing and seed-planting.
That’s all I’ve got for today. Enjoy the video!
Sharing this beautiful post from my friend, Laura. Thanks in large part to her and her awesome husband, as well as several other friends, Jason and I will be making this place our home at the end of this month!
To say that this place is a dream come true for us just doesn’t do justice to our journey. I will write more about that once we get settled in to the new place, but for now, I leave you with Laura’s gorgeous photos.
The first summer we lived here — 2013 — this median facing an ugly view required a date with two batteries worth of weed whackers at least three times per week. We’re talking fast growing, out of control weeds on a strip of land with giant holes and rock hard, uneven soil, and an often flooded driveway. It crushed my soul to see this median as we approached our house.
I can barely believe the difference four years makes! This same strip is now a rain garden, bird and butterfly paradise, with serviceberry trees, Robinhood roses, sunflowers, lilies, milkweed, bachelor’s buttons, love in a mist, cosmos, and more. The fragrance alone is worth the trip. Last year, those roses bloomed from late May through the end of November with barely any care. Birds ate the hips this winter and spring.
Don’t ever doubt that you can change the world, one…
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Creating your own reality does not mean that you decide what you want, imagine every detail, wave your magic wand, and BANG! You wake up to the world you created, whole and complete.
At least it doesn’t mean that for me. And I suspect it doesn’t mean that for a lot…dare I say, most….people.
Instead, creating your own reality really happens in the small choices you make every day, moment to moment, about what you will and won’t believe, what you will and won’t give your attention and focus to, what you will and won’t allow into your life.
A shift happened inside me at some point in the last two years. I decided to just believe whatever I want to. A big, ole F you to anyone who thought I was nuts, stupid, gullible, or childish. I had long been drawn to “magickal” things and ideas…energy manipulation, manifestation, moving sideways along alternate realities, faeries, tree beings, and on and on. I was afraid to surrender to what I feared some would view as a child-like indulgence of imagination, especially since I was heavily invested in being the smart, studious girl I had earned a reputation for being. Smart girls and faeries did not go together in my world. But, little by little, I began to see that I could re-write the story of myself. I wasn’t stuck being the character I had created for myself. Just like a figure in a story, I could erase parts and change them. So, that’s what I have been doing.
It all really started with learning to accept certain things about myself, and peel away things that I had taken on, but that no longer suited me. For example, I have always loved knowing how things work. It’s a near-biological need to understand why this happens when I pull, push, twist, or throw that. That part of me has helped me begin to understand how to get what I want, how to manipulate the laws that govern our physical plane to move myself in the direction I want to go. For me, it is truly no different from understanding why my car goes when I push on the gas pedal (although some things are more important for me to retain than others…lol) Accepting my need to understand meant that I could strip away my feelings of nosiness, guilt, even shame, for probing into things that some considered none of my business, or that led me to information that was not always backed up by scientific research. I do dearly love research, but I found that only accepting things that had a scientific backing no longer served me. So I let it go.
The work of accepting myself and stripping away things that are not myself led to moments of being allowed to glimpse the Mystery. I had what I have since called a Waterfall moment, when it felt like my head opened up and pure loving energy flowed in. The experience last for about 15 minutes, and it changed me. I started to see things out of the corner of my eye. I found Reiki and my friend Laura, who has mentored me and loved me as friend, sister, and child for lifetimes. I began to hear music in the still dark. I began to notice things about others that were different from my memory of them. I began to find that if I sent loving energy to someone who was being rude or mean to me, they often came back either entirely changed or changed toward me. And I began to believe my eyes and ears and intuition.
In each moment that I see, hear, or sense something that is outside the norm, I find that I have a split-second decision to make: do I trust this or do I not trust this. Do I accept this as real or do I not accept this as real. It comes down to an almost subconscious choice to trust myself and the Universe. But I can make that choice because I did all the other work, all the small, slow steps leading up to this. The Veil is parting wider for me because I chose each time the opportunity presented itself to look to the other side and not turn my back. When I heard the voice and felt the waves of energy from my Tree friends, I opened my heart and hugged them with my arms, even though I felt silly the first few times and wondered if I was losing my mind. I did not turn my back on Them and pretend I didn’t hear. And the first time I felt that an animal had a message for me, I accepted it for truth and went about trying to figure out what the message was. And when I saw a flit of iridescent wings and an echo of giggles, I stood in wonder and thanks for the gift of having seen my first faery since childhood. For every new Mystery glimpsed, I offer thanks, and I refuse to turn my back any more. This is how I create my reality. This is how you will create your reality, too.
Acknowledge what you want. Devote your attention to looking for the things you want. Be aware of what is reality for others, for it could impact you, too, especially in the beginning, but do not allow yourself to be drawn into their version of what is true. It’s like being aware that there are other tv channels playing other things, but since you don’t want to watch those other channels, they cease to mean anything significant to you.
You will find whatever you look for. I promise.
I am not usually a fan of poetry which is too sing-song-y, but this one popped into my head almost fully formed and begged to be used as a prayer for the new moon ritual I am planning tomorrow night in honor of a renewed friendship and lessons to come.
Welcome, The Morrigan
The Raven wings, they suit her,
because the birds are quick and smart
Feared by ancients when her legend formed,
She took their spirit to heart.
Softly borne on blackened feathers,
She now wings into my life
to guide me deeper into my truth
and help me shine my light.
The Bear could be her totem, too,
for her ferocious guard of the land
and her gentle, nurturing other face,
her firm but loving hand.
And then, there’s the playful maiden form,
dancing in on faery winds!
She catches me up in her arms
and we giggle as we spin.
This goddess guide, The Morrigan,
a new and ancient friend,
your faces I remember now
from other wheres and whens.
I honor you and welcome you-
I’ve missed our moonlit meetings!
To my friend and teacher once again,
I offer love and warmest greetings.
I bet many of you lived in a place like this, and you will be able to relate to what I am about to say. My family lived in several places like this; some in trailer parks, some not. But they all shared a smell, especially in the South: cockroach spray. All the places we lived in reeked of the stuff. I can still smell it in my mind. By the time we lived in them in the mid-80s, these places had seen way better days. They often had soft floors around places where water might accumulate, like the toilet, the shower, and the kitchen and bathroom sinks. In one trailer, we had to be careful not to stand too close to the front of the shower because the floor under it was so weak, a 90 pound 11-year-old might go crashing, naked, through the floor on to the ground below. In another place we lived, that actually did happen to my mother, and she had the scars on her right calf to prove it until the day she died.
We didn’t always live in trailers. A few times, we lived in apartments, but those proved to be no better. Another place we lived, an upstairs apartment, had one bedroom that was completely unusable because the previous tenant had had dogs who were kept enclosed in it and there was so much calcified dog poop on the floor that you couldn’t walk anywhere in the room without stepping on it. I got the thankless job of ripping it up out of the bright blue carpet and scrubbing the spots with a bucket of hot, soapy water. It never was a room we could use for anything but storage.
In that same apartment, we could not afford to have the hot water turned on. Bath water was heated on the stove in a large roasting pan and poured into the bathtub. I washed my waist-length hair in icy water from the tap in the kitchen.
Why am I telling you this? So you will understand the week I have had.
My husband and I have gradually improved on my experience of home, but I have never felt that I left it entirely behind. In all the spiritual work I have done, particularly in the last two years, I have moved leaps and bounds beyond the idea that I somehow deserved to be hidden away in unhealthy, ugly places, but my belief has still been put to the test this week.
The home of a very dear friend is coming open for rent in just over a month, and I have loved it from the moment I stepped inside it. There is a magnificent garden attached that she has lovingly, painstakingly restored from a desolate, weed-choked wasteland to an oasis of peace and beauty. I long with everything inside me to take up Guardianship of this place that feels sacred to me. But, I have struggled with finding enough faith in myself – and in the Universe- to seize the opportunity in front of me.
As I went back and forth this week, breaking myself down and remaking myself into a true believer in my own worthiness, all my old memories of home resurfaced, and I have faced them with as much bravery as I could muster.
I wanted to share these thoughts of home with you today because it feels important to me to acknowledge my struggle, for maybe you have struggled with similar growth along your journey, or are struggling now. We can be the support we need for each other.
As I work my way through this period of intense growth, I also feel within me a rising of something I cannot even name yet. I think it may be an entirely new version of myself. I see her as more fully embodied, able to bring the visions in her head down into the Earth to be made manifest in this 3D realm. I see a woman who feels at home in a place that has firm floors, hot water, sacred spaces, and healthy boundaries. I see a woman coming fully into her power.
The part of me that is already the woman I see in my mind’s eye believes that I will be living in this beautiful place that feels like home by the middle of July. The part of me that is still hiding, seeking a place that is clean and bright and whole, is terrified that things won’t come together in time, and I will be forever trapped in places like the ones I grew up in. I hold that child-me in my arms and rock her, whispering that she is safe, she is safe, she is safe.
And as I do, her tears dry, her smile blossoms, and she gets up and runs outside to play in the garden of her dreams.
We could all use a little more whimsy, enchantment, and connection in our daily lives. Here are some things I have done and used to do just that:
- Create one or more altars.
An altar is just a sacred, special space set aside for a particular purpose. You can set the intention for anything you like: greater abundance, healing, and a closer connection to the Divine are all popular altar themes. Once you know what your altar is in honor of, then you can choose items that are meaningful to you that reinforce what you want to focus on. For example, a healing altar might have crystals that promote healing, a photo of something that makes you think of being healthy and healed, a letter you write to your body, or anything that has meaning to you and pertains to the theme of the altar. You can also set up a general household altar that has a more all-purpose meaning. It really is up to you! Try setting up multiple altars around your home. Any flat surface will do – even vertical ones – and you can add anything that is meaningful to you and relates to the theme you’ve chosen.
Meditation gets a bad rap, sometimes. People think it’s hard or you have to spend a lot of time at it, neither of which is true. Meditation simply means to focus on the space between thoughts. That can happen during a lot of activities: washing dishes, an art project, swinging on the front porch swing, or lying in your bed on the verge of sleep. The idea is to create an empty, still space for new intuitions to emerge and to allow your mind to relax.
An easy way to begin is to focus on your breath and focus on what it feels like to inhale, and then exhale. Notice each tiny sensation. Before long, your body and mind begin to relax, and lo, and behold! You are meditating!
If you would like more guidance on how to meditate, there are countless videos on youtube.com that will help you relax and find that space between your thoughts in no time. I especially like the ones with binaural beats or brain entrainment elements.
- Be Aware
Pay attention to your surroundings! Engage all five senses while mentally naming each sensation. Does the air smell like grass? Like oil and car exhaust? Like food? What is the air temperature like…too hot? Too cold? Just right? What about sounds? What do you see? It doesn’t take a lot of time, but paying attention to what’s around you and taking a moment to name those sights, sounds, smells, textures, and even emotions can tune you in to the magic of the moment, adding an element of joy and pleasure to your day.
- Buy yourself some flowers
I very often see grocery store bouquets for $5 or less. You can break them up into smaller arrangements and scatter them all around your home or office to bring some life and color and the special joy that flowers bring. Flowers also invite faeries to visit!
- Play with a pet
Your pets miss you while you’re away, and playing with them even for just a few minutes can soothe you both and help you reconnect.
- Make your last 5 minutes before sleep count
What you think about in your last 5 minutes before sleep is what your brain ruminates on all night. Make it something that will help you, rather than hurt. For example, if you go to bed thinking about how awful your life is, your mind spends all night reinforcing that thought with dreams, hormones, repeating thoughts, and you wake up in the morning feeling as though the day is already a disaster! Try a week where, before you go to sleep, you think about all the things you are grateful for. Make them up if you have to, but do not resort to sarcasm. Feel grateful as best you can. After a week, you will see a difference in how your days go! (For more tips on making your sleep a spiritual practice, read my blog post here.)
- Write wish lists
The Universe cannot bring us things it does not know we want. Often, we don’t know what we want, ourselves. Take some time to write down all the big and little things you want from your life and your day. From very small things like a cup of that Chai Latte, to very large things like the home of your dreams, WRITE IT DOWN. The act of writing it imbues the wish with emotion and energy, making it more likely to find its way to you.
- Place meaningful objects around your home
Frame the photos on your phone, bring in the beautiful dead tree branch from your yard, get the old desk out of the garage that was your grandfather’s that you just love. Our homes are a reflection of what means the most to us. But…..
- Get serious – and brutal – about what you keep in your home
There is a famous quote about not keeping anything in your home that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful. Clutter can quickly take the shine off of being at home, making it feel overwhelming, stressful, and unhappy. Start small or go big, but get rid of anything you no longer love or use.
- Look for signs
There are signs everywhere that God/The Universe/ Spirit/Big Momma is watching over you, loves you, and wants you to be happy. Sure, you could say they are coincidence, but which is more fun- thinking that nobody “up there” cares, or that you are the beloved child of something greater than yourself? If you choose the latter, there will be evidence for you to find… repeating numbers, happy “accidents”, information that comes to you at just the right time, even people appearing in your life just when you need them! (Psst…I don’t believe in coincidence…to read more about that, click here)
- Write Morning Pages
The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron describes Morning Pages like this: 3 pages, long-hand, stream-of-consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning before your brain has a chance to wake that cranky old Editor who lives in there and inhibits you. Try it for 30 days and see what you think.
- Edit your input
Every single thing that goes into your brain stays there forever. Facebook is a prime garbage dump to pick up stuff that doesn’t serve you: Do you really need your cousin’s rant about her neighbors rattling around in your mind? What about the racist jokes your friend from high school posts that just make you mad? TV is another medium that offers more harmful content than good, in my opinion: Do you really need another gory image of a dead body in your head along with the story line from Criminal Minds? I don’t. I am happier without them. Be careful what you put into your mind. Books, movies, conversations, all contribute to the climate of your emotional landscape. And you can control that—so, DO!
- Smile at strangers
Just do it and see what happens. 🙂
- Do something fun or silly
Why should silliness stop at age 10? Who says fun has to be reserved for weekend nights? Make faces at yourself in the mirror, record a video of yourself on Snapchat, play a game with your spouse or kids, dress up in a silly outfit and just wear it around the house…whatever strikes your fancy.
- Sleep in
Don’t set an alarm, make sure your bed is cozy, comfy, and clean, and sleep until you wake up naturally.
We are not here to simply pay bills and die (that’s a whole other post…). We are here to feel joy in its many, many forms. Adding joy and magick to your everyday is not difficult or time-consuming and can really enhance your life. Feel free to share your suggestions in the comments!
My husband and I recently watched most of this series on Gaia.com, and we found it utterly fascinating. I just found episode 1 on youtube, as well.
If you love keeping up with the new edge where science and spirituality intersect, this is a must-watch!
My path is strewn with love!
I feel the embrace of the Universe,
Reminding me that all is well.
The light that glows at the end of this
Flowery and tree-lined tunnel
Is not my future, but my Now
Seen from the perspective of a world
That lives in three dimensions
And believes that Time is a Thing and a Line.
I sink down into the sweetness
Of every moment that is Now with a sigh,
As if sinking into a warm bath at the end of a long day.
Remember, I think, the sweetness of all Moments.
Remember they all brown and wither and remain pink and alive forever
Like the flowers at my feet.
It’s feeling like a joyful day! In that spirit, I’d like to share some photos from my Pinterest board, Joyfulness. These are images that make me feel light, uplifted, and filled with a sense of wonder. You can find the entire board here.
This is a ranunculus, or Persian Buttercup. Ranunculus (ranunculi??) are one of my favorite kinds of flowers for their delicate, feathery leaves and sweet, layered buds. And they come in some of the loveliest colors in Nature.
I love to see the first bursts of bright yellow dandelions in the spring. They are the first sign of color and cheer after what are often very dark and grey winter days here in northern Indiana. Dandelions get a bad rap, but they are so useful! I love dandelion root tea because it tastes good, but it also helps improve liver function. Here is some more about the health benefits of dandelions.
Just look at this one for a moment and breathe in that smell…. Now, sit down in that log, soak in the sun, and examine those delicate little flowers. Find a piece of moss and let your imagination out for a run.
Speaking of moss, tell me you don’t want to sit down there and pet that stuff 🙂 Mosses are interesting plants. If you haven’t read Elizabeth Gilbert’s The Signature of All Things, I encourage you to do so. It is a novel about the daughter of a wealthy 19th century businessman who makes a lifelong study of mosses. For a little non-fiction information, this site has a nice little overview.
This little fern frond was the inspiration for my choice of Unfurled as one of my first core desired feelings, a concept introduced by Danielle LaPorte in her book, The Desire Map, which has been deeply influential in the last two years of my life.
I leave you on this Monday with the delicate and luscious (another core desired feeling) peony.
Have a joyful week!